Ruin by Rachel Van Dyken

Synopsis:

I'm not your typical girl. I've been running away from the memories that haunt me for so long that depression has become my only comfort. I was content in the darkness...until Wes Michals offered to be my light.

I didn't know that time wasn't my ally -- that every second that ticked past was one step closer to the end of something that was beginning to mean the end of myself. He tried to warn me. He promised me all he was able to offer--each moment as it came--but it would never be enough.

Sometimes when you think it's the end, it's only the beginning. Wes thought he could save me, but in giving me everything, he ruined me. Because after one kiss, one touch, I couldn't--I wouldn't ever be the same.

And from that moment on, his heartbeat became my own.

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Review:   

Reviewed by Heather 

4.5 "ruined me" smooches!

From the first few pages, Ruin consumed me.  I read this book with a constant lump in my throat and hand over my heart.  I NEEDED to keep reading and was scared to turn the page for fear of what I knew would come.

 I'd gladly take the place of the guy picking his nose by the front door, or even the chick with glasses and buck teeth.  I'd trade spots and run in the opposite direction.  Not because I hated my life--nope, it was the exact opposite.  I loved life.

Wes is a senior in college and star of the football team.  There are rumors about him all over school. When Kiersten literally runs into him on her first day, she has no clue who he is. 

I shouldn't have looked.  If I could go back in time, I would have.  I had no idea that one look would devastate me.  Weeks from now I would regret that one look, for one reason and one reason only.
His eyes Held my ruin.

Wes and Kiersten are the unlikeliest of couples.  Wes is a popular senior and known player and Kiersten a virginal, shy, and depressed freshman.  But, somehow they click and a friendship is forged.  As much as Wes wants Kiersten, he tries to fight it.  Wes has issues... secrets, and he knows he can't give Kiersten forever.  They have fun together and flirt constantly.

"Please don't be one of those guys that thinks it's funny to put spiders or snakes in girls' hands to hear them scream."

"I can't lie, Kiersten.  I want to hear you scream, but not like that.  Definitely, not like that." 

What the heart wants cannot be denied.  They fall and fall hard.  Kiersten knows something is going on but chooses to ignore it and live in the moment with Wes.  He heals her.  He helps her through all of the bad shit that has happened in her life.  Kiersten is finally happy and in love.  Then, she learns what Wes has been keeping from her.

I was drowning like I'd always feared--only this time it wasn't in water, it was in air.  I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think.

Her best friend, Gabe is a shoulder for her to cry on.  He gives Kiersten the advice she needs to carry on.

 "What you two have--it's a once in a lifetime-- you fight for him, sweetheart.  Fight for him with every last breath.  No regrets, okay?"