Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Twosome Twosday: Love and Lists by Tara Sivec

Title: Love and Lists (Chocoholics #1)
Author: Tara Sivec
Release Day: 9/30/2013


Purchase Links
Amazon | Barnes & Noble


Love and Lists is the first book in the Chocolate Lovers spinoff - Chocoholics: The foul-mouthed offspring tell their stories.

Twenty-five-year-old Gavin Ellis has always had the love and support of his family ever since he was a little boy and couldn't stop talking about his penis. He's also always had their unsolicited advice and uncanny knack of embarrassing him at all costs. Now that he's an adult and trying to convince the love of his life to love him back, things haven't changed very much from when he was younger.

When Gavin's best friend Tyler suggests he make a to-do list of items that will ensure he wins the girl, Gavin is one-hundred-percent on board: after a few six packs. After puking in the shrubs, a bad experience with Viagra, a Sex-Ed course gone wrong, and a slew of other mishaps courtesy of his family and friends, Gavin is pretty sure this list will be the death of him.

Sometimes, trying to make someone love you with a list isn't always the best idea. Especially when "Show her your penis" is the first "to-do" item....

Find out where it all started!
Enjoy the antics of Gavin's parents and their best friends in The Chocolate Lovers Series. This special edition book contains the complete Chocolate Lovers series at a great price ($6!!!!)!

(Click to purchase books separately)
Seduction and Snacks - Book 1
Futures and Frosting - Book 2
Troubles and Treats - Book 3
Hearts and Llamas - Short Story

Heather's Review

4.5 "Fuck your mother" smooches

Tara Sivec writes romantic comedy on CRACK! If you have not yet read the Chocolate Lovers series, go get them right now and laugh til you cry and fold over with stomach cramps! Isn't that the best kind of laughter?

Love & Lists is the first book in the Chocoholics spin off series, starring the offspring of the Chocolate Lovers crew. Remember Gavin? The funny 4 year old obsessed with his wiener? Well… now he is a funny 25 year old still obsessed with his wiener! He is all grown up and heads up creative development at Seduction and Snacks(coolest job EVERRRRR).

Gavin has been secretly pining away for his best friend, Charlotte(Liz & Jim's daughter). Everyone seems to know about his feelings for her, but Charlotte, including her mother.

"If he's going to be having sex with my daughter, he will damn well wrap his shit up!" ~ Liz

Gavin's best friend, Tyler, is the Drew in this crowd (stupid funny!). He decides to help Gavin out by compiling a list of things that he needs to do to win the girl. Let's just say that NO ONE should be taking any sort of advice from Tyler.

Tyler is in lust with Claire, Gavin's mom, and it makes for some hysterical, awkward moments between these two friends.

"You think imagining your parents having sex is bad, try thinking about your mom masturbating. Now THAT's disturbing… Wait, that's not disturbing at all. Fuck, now I'm thinking about Claire flicking the bean." ~Tyler

It seems that poor Gavin cannot do anything to impress this girl. The list goes terribly wrong and makes a train wreck of a hilarious story!

"I can't believe you don't know how to change a tire. You're a guy and you have a penis. You should have been born knowing how to change a tire!"

"Yea, well you're a girl and you have a vagina. Does that mean you can waltz over to that field over there, squat down, and pop out a baby?"

I love Tara Sivec. She writes the most loveable, idiotic, funny characters. Even with all of the stupid-funny, the writing is good and the stories entertaining.

Selene's Review

4.5 Vaginaman, Mangina Smooches!

If you are a fan of the Chocolate Lovers series, you will not be disappointed by Love and Lists, the first book in the spinoff Chocoholic series. Gavin Ellis is the grown-up version of the foul-mouthed yet adorable son of Claire and Carter. He's twenty-five years old and works at the now very successful Seduction and Snacks empire his mom and her best friend Liz started. He does marketing research for sex toys.

You try being in a bar flirting with a chick and see the look on her face when you tell her you touch rubber penises all day. They all think I'm gay. Or a creeper. Like I'm going to just whip a dildo out of my back pocket and chase her around the room with it. That only happened once, and I was really drunk. I swear. - Gavin

Grown up Gavin isn't the man I thought obnoxious, no filter young Gavin would grow to be. Don't get me wrong, he has his mom's quirky, crazy side but Gavin is responsible and somewhat reserved and lets his best friend Tyler wear the obnoxious crown (think Drew Jr. if you read the Chocolate Lovers series). While uncouth and "in your face," Tyler is very endearing and brings a lot of laughs to the story. He has a mad crush on Gavin's mom and isn't the least bit shy about it!

"Shut up about my mother."
"No can do. She's going to be mine one day. You should just start calling me dad now."

Gavin is head over heels in love with Charlotte but just can't bring himself to make his move. They've grown up together …. Charlotte is Liz's daughter. They've been friends forever and since their parents are best friends, Gavin is terrified to let Charlotte know how really feels about her. Besides, she has a boyfriend.

So what's a guy in love to do …. make a list of all the things he can do to win her heart.

There are two really good things about this book … it's funny. Hysterical, laugh out loud, make your eyes water funny. And secondly, the book is well written. Nothing takes away from the funny.

Tara is definitely my "go to" author when I need some book candy and Love and Lists is spot on! If you are in the mood for a quick, fun read, this is most definitely the book for you!

A few funnies ...

"Stop being so dramatic. It couldn't have been that bad. If you touch the penis, the penis will be happy. I did have one guy, though, who would only touch my penis with his thumb and forefinger. Like he was trying to milk a cow. I'm not saying I have a ginormous penis or anything, but it's definitely bigger than a cow's teat." - Rocco

"Want to know what the ten erogenous zones on a woman are? Number one: vagina. Number two: it doesn't fucking matter if you're touching her vagina right!" - Drew

Housewives Commentary

*Please note that these are actual conversation subject to typos and that bastard we all know as autocorrect. Please forgive our errors ;)

About the Author

Tara Sivec is a wife, mom, chauffeur, cheerleading coach, soccer coach, babysitter, short-order cook, genius and albino squirrel hunter. She lives in Ohio with her husband and two kids. In her spare time she likes read, write and cover things in chocolate. Most of her material comes from real life experiences with family and friends. Lucky for them, the names have been changed to protect the innocent (aka, drunk).

Tara also writes under the pen name T.E. Sivec where she can be serious, suspenseful and not at all funny.

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